If you've started yelling, you need to know how to stop screaming at your kids. Yelling and screaming to get the kids' attention is a nasty habit that probably started one day when you were overwhelmed and too tired for positive parenting practices and then before long, it was your secret weapon aka nasty habit.
Believe me, I know what I'm talking about here. As the stress of taking care of a chronically ill child and then my husband started to take its toll...my voice started rising in lockstep. And it worked for a little while but then one day I realized I was turning into THAT mommy.
There was a mom like that in my neighborhood when I was a kid. It was the joke of the block. I can remember hearing this lady's loud, loud voice and the adults laughing and saying stuff like, "There goes Mrs. So and So on her evening rant". Why nobody actually tried to help is beyond me. The woman worked several jobs and had no husband, but if anyone did I was not aware of it.
Getting back to my own life, awhile back, I realized that my speaking voice when dealing with my older girls had risen to levels that probably could be heard next door. An echo that came back at me from across the valley tipped me off and a little voice whispered in my ear, "You need to learn how to stop screaming at your kids!"
Once I dedicated myself to keeping household's noise level to a low hum, I realized I didn't just need to lower my voice. I needed to take a look at where the yelling was coming from. It hit me that my nerves and emotions are shot from sheer overwork and exhaustion. The reason I have started to lose it with the children is because I am overworked and they have started to "take control" which is only natural since mommy appears to have lost hers. They have become powerful as a group in the face of my weakness.
I am going to have to turn the tide, regain control and win back my kids' respect and there is no time like the present. The loving family that I dreamed of and started out with is not going to slip through my fingers for one more minute. I am pledging to take control of my emotions and keep my cool.
Here are some ideas that I I'm putting to work today.
Stop feeling sorry for myself
- Take an attitude of gratitude
- Stay in the moment and don't drift into the past or future stressing about what could be or what might have been.
- Take a little time for myself so that I'm rested and better equipped to handle things
- Take a minute to calm myself before opening my mouth
I'm going to read some books on the subject of how to stop yelling at your kids and take the best tips to heart and chunk the rest. I am not going to be the village joke just because my life has not turned out just the way I planned it. My plan is to replace my stressed out chaotic reactions with calm reasoning.
Please pray for me and if you have any suggestions on how I can stay on track and start parenting my kids again rather than losing control and yelling at them I would love to hear from you.